I enjoy
Conversations
With myself
Never loved them
More with
Anyone else
I love myself
Some would
Say it’s insane
To confide
In yourself
But who else
Is left?
Who can I run to?
When the friend
Is an enemy
That didn’t
Mean to
Turn on you.
Truth hurts.
Sitting here
Self inflicted
Poisoned pain
Who can I turn to?
Not you.
I poisoned you.
Came back
to suck
It out.
Miserable
What I did to you
It doesn’t hold
Me back
No dwell
On a past
Observation
Is my bliss
Intuition is
My kiss
Somewhat
Of a daily
Walking
Vision quest
How does he deal
With me ?
Flying around
These woes
You see
I’ve recognized
All the foes
Don’t worry
In the end
It wasn’t you
Poor brain
You let them
Get to you
Acted the way
They told you to
Showed them the
Devil you knew
You weren’t supposed
To do
What the hell?
Who am I?
Ego
Is that all?
Hurt?
Is that all?
Angry.
It’s not all.
Living my trauma
Thinking I
Could survive
I couldn’t be
Myself
With anyone
Faking through
The telephone
To you
Acting like life
Was FINE.
It wasn’t !
It isn’t!
I wanted to
Tell you.
I thought I’d
Lose you.
If I told you
The truth.
If I told you
I don’t envy
This. I don’t
Want this.
This fence
These sheets
This roof
These chains
I never figured out
My true pain
Angst held my
Throat
I ran to a van
To the den
I hide in
I’m getting too old
To hide
Can’t take it anymore
The floor is a bore
I got up
I thought you’d be there
I thought you’d tell me
I’m glad you made it
Through
But you weren’t there.
Not even your voice.
Why didn’t you yell at me?
Why couldn’t you insult me?
Why wouldn’t you
Take it out on me
Like you wanted to?
So controlled it
Broke my heart.
Rehearsed verse
Like a shitty song
You cover.
You know you
Are more
Than this
Man.
This marriage.
This vision.
Remember when I
Pulled your thoughts
From your eyes?
Come alive.
It’s real.
Kundalini on my spine
You.
That was your soul.
Saving me.
While you were
Too busy being human.
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