What Is It Like

I’ve been wondering

Lately what it feels like

To have a home

Not only a home to live in

But one to visit like

I’ve lived there all along

Can you tell me what it’s like

To visit your old bedroom

When you go back to your roots

What is it like to have parents

That have been together

This whole time

Are they still in the same house

As when you were a kid

Do you drive your kids down the

Same street you used to ride

Your bike in

I have so many homes

I could drive to multiple counties

And find a little version of me

Still sitting on the side of the road

Is this my home

In my head

Is this why being vulnerable

Is so hard for me to comprehend

I cannot say I lack family

I just wonder what it’s like to be

Able to go back home

When you pull in the drive

Do you stare at the same door

Like you’ve been here before

Or do you take for granted everything

They taught you and everything you know

Can you please write to me

And tell me what it’s like growing old

I’m out here sailing this lonely sea

Heading to my true north

Abandoning all that poisons me

Sometimes I think I’ll end up

In the jungle and just leave it all behind

I wonder what it’s like to have a place

Every version of you has been

What is it like to have one home

And two parents that still love each other

After all this time

It’s not like their life has been easy

But what a shining example of

Unconditional love to see

Can you tell me if you’ve

Found your home

I know you were desperate

To make your own life

Prove to everyone

You could do whatever you wanted

Finally be some place where

Everyone wanted to listen to you

I wonder what it’s like being petted

So falsely I wonder if it had been me

If I would’ve been conned so easily

What’s it like to have someone obsess

Over you — to literally make their identity

All about you — what’s it like to die slowly

On the inside but to everyone around

You you’re so happy and alive

What’s it like to be in false love

Waving in and out of it

Like you can’t get enough

What’s it like to give up on yourself

I’m not sure I’ll ever know

What happened to him

I just know when I close my eyes

There you are with so many lies

Chained to the melody

Condemned to repeat

Until you remember your true fate

Call it karma

And call me a bitch

You should wonder what it’s like

To be me forced to see this Shit

I have cut cords

Sent love

Saged anger

Surrendered you to the alter

Yet here you are

I tell myself

I don’t know you anymore

Yet I send angels and demons to

Protect you from the energies

You view as a skeptic

You make me love my left brain

You’re going to live longer than me

Forever in you

Forever in me

Don’t worry

You don’t have to grieve me

I’ve written everything down

For when I leave all the answers

That reside in me will be in you

You’ll have to finally sit down

Finally love yourself like

God and I love you

No mistakes have happened

You did what you were supposed to do

Just like I did

Our children had to come through

They have their own mission

Just like us to do

Don’t worry about the money

I’ll leave you so much of that too

My head is my home

My heart has always been yours

It’s something I’ve fought

But no need to run from

the truth anymore

You play matrix all you want

I know who you are

I know you from the beginning

And I hope to see you before The End

If that day never comes

Then do as I’ve done

Write it out and give it to the world

Get out of your own way

And cast this jealous love away

Break these cycles that keep us at bay

I feel it when you break inside

I can’t put you energetically

Back together forever

Breathe on your own

Like you made me do

One day I’ll see you

And wrap myself up

In your infinity

Forever is a long time

To wander the cosmos

This is for your best self

And mine

I wish I didn’t feel like

I’m running out of time

But I really am

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1:10pm

Tell me what is it like to have a home

Someone you can come home to

And exhale and rest

What’s it like to go home to

The place you started this life

1:11pm