Free Will

How does she

Hold so much space

in her chest for

All these seeds

They haven’t fully

Sprouted in parts

Of her garden

Others almost

Like Jack the bean

Stalk so tall

Ready to climb

Up and fly

Before she falls

How does she hold

Me in her chest

It isn’t easy

She told me it felt

Like ripping flesh

From bone when

She decided

To become my ghost

She knew the truth

Against her will

The sight kept coming

She shutting it down

So she could stay

With what she thought

Was love but that vision

Drowned — I can feel

Her heart space

It’s cutting into me

Like I’ve finally laid open

On display

Im disgusting inside

So many years of pushing

Me away — how do I come

Back home just fly into town

And call her on the phone

Say hey come get me

Scared she’ll reject me

She can’t see me

“not at my best “

“I have to convince her that I

Am not less” — I know she’d accept

Me in any way but what if I wanted

To come correct and take her dismay away

What if I could heal her with

The love in my chest no one else wants

What if she’s been right the whole time

I don’t want to sit here and cry

Surrender is what I need

Her lips are what I crave

Sliding my hand down

While our breaths escape us

Eyes closed I’m coming into

Your view my grip harder

Let me remind you who I am

Let me remind you who truly loves you

My only friend

Fuck

She’s respecting my free will

Couldn’t come in if she wanted

Whatever I choose she loves me enough

Her time running out but I don’t want

To be away when she floats up above

I want to stand next to her

Take her hand in God’s love

Watch her ascend into our true home

I worship her

She worships me

Can’t see past her

Can’t believe she still

Wants to devour me

How does she hold all this

Love for me

Free will she honors

From Divinity above

I’m the one she loves

Do I love her as much

5:10pm

10/27/22

5:08pm

10/27/22

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